Welcome to my website. I launch this new web presence on the anniversary of my first-born’s birth and in honor of my mother. My son will turn 26 today, and just 2 months ago marked the 25th anniversary of my momma’s death. She died when he was just 10 months old.
The collision of these two life-changing events – becoming a mother while my own mother slowly slipped from this world into the next – was the single most formative event of my life. I look back and wonder, how did I do it? I was 28, she was 48, she had all the answers, I had none – and then I had not even her. My journey was a difficult one, but one that was marked with much joy, laughter and learning, for there, in my mother’s absence, God met me. He met me in my darkness, in my alone-ness.
Becoming a mother taught me so much: about human nature, about myself, about the world and most importantly about God. This website is from that decidedly Christian perspective. It must be for there was nothing else for me, no one else to turn to but God, to finally look outside of myself for the answers. My first 28 years alive were marked with selfish, self-centered ambition and actions; after becoming a mother, it was my turn, in succession, to set my own interests aside, as my mother had done for me, and her mother before her.
I’m not a doctor – there are plenty of great sites for that kind of help. I’m not a psychologist, nor a teacher, I’m a mother, a momma of five. I am a Christian, I struggle. I am a broken person, trying to train up and love broken children, in a broken world. The task has been big – bigger than I realized – but with God’s wisdom, His unfailing love, and curious sense of humor, I have worked through my struggles, and learned from my own mistakes and the mistakes of those around me. I want to share what I’ve learned; this is an opportunity for me to turn my sadness and struggles into something useful.
In recent years, the role of mother has been minimized and misunderstood. I think the tide is turning. I meet young mothers every day – educated, bright young women – who are in their turn setting aside their own self-centeredness in order to make the needed sacrifices for their own children. It is my goal to be one of the many voices of guidance on the internet, yet I approach that purpose in a uniquely eclectic fashion, as unique as I am. I hope you will join me on this journey; it should be fun.
~ ily momma